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9 Replies to “Couples talk about sex vid”

  1. You know, the erotic mind is not very politically correct. Give me belonging, give me identity, give me continuity, but give me transcendence and mystery and awe all in one. And at the heart of sustaining desire in a committed relationship, I think, is the reconciliation of two fundamental human needs.

  2. So I want to draw that little image for you, because this need to reconcile these two sets of needs, we are born with that. In desire, we want a bridge to cross.

  3. But more importantly, for me to begin to understand who are the couples who have an erotic spark, what sustains desire, I had to go back to the original definition of eroticism, the mystical definition, and I went through it through a bifurcation by looking, actually, at trauma, which is the other side. So the first group is: Not attracted sexually, per Se, but most drawn. How do they relate, and how do they conflict?

  4. Responsibility and desire just butt heads. Now, in this paradox between love and desire, what seems to be so puzzling is that the very ingredients that nurture love — mutuality, reciprocity, protection, worry, responsibility for the other — are sometimes the very ingredients that stifle desire. The more connected I became, the more responsible I felt, the less I was able to let go in your presence. Laughter So I turn myself on when, I turn on my desires, I wake up when

  5. My partner hasn't taken care of me in so long. What do you seek to express there? There is nobody at the reception desk.

  6. It's a powerful anti-aphrodisiac. Marriage was an economic institution in which you were given a partnership for life in terms of children and social status and succession and companionship. Is it a place where you can finally surrender and not have to take responsibility for everything? But we also have an equally strong need — men and women — for adventure, for novelty, for mystery, for risk, for danger, for the unknown, for the unexpected, surprise — you get the gist.

  7. And then the third group of answers usually would be: That's the million-dollar question, right? The ability to imagine it, as if it's happening, to experience it as if it's happening, while nothing is happening and everything is happening, at the same time. It won't make a dent.

  8. What parts of you do you connect to? What comes out there? But then I took a question with me.

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